Starter Villains

By John Scalzi

Narrated by Will Wheaton

As the first book by Scalzi that I had read, I didn’t know much of what to expect. In the book blurb, it mentioned covert felines and dolphins trying to unionize, so I was expecting something more akin to Megamind or the Incredibles. But Starter Villain plays with the James Bond tropes of villains, but they aren’t quite villains in this book. As is explained to the protagonist early on, villain is a word that status-quo interrupters have used as a way to take back the word.

Charlie Fitzer, an out-of-work business reporter is on his way to the bank to apply for a loan when he hears his estranged uncle has passed. Denied the loan, John is barely making ends meet with his substitute teacher gig and is behind on the taxes for the house he shares ownership of with his half-siblings. So, when his dead uncle’s assistant shows up to deliver his uncle’s last request, Charlie seems to have fallen into the perfect solution to his situation. All he has to do is show up to his uncle’s funeral and stand up for him. But things start to get really weird, really quick.

One of the things I like about Scalzi’s books is that none of his protagonists seem that their previous life experience qualifies them in any way for the inevitable mishaps and problems they will encounter. Yet, it always works out that the seemingly useless backstory comes into play at some point. The villains in the novel are the real-life (in this fictional universe) inspiration for Specter, the evil organization in the early Bond films, right down to the lap cats they keep on hand during their secret meetings.

I found the book to be whimsical, well-written, and hilarious. I laughed out loud at the line, “F your effing fingers.” Man, dolphins are dicks. Will Wheaton’s performance in the audiobook wasn’t as good as in RedShirts or Kaiju Preservation Society. I think Starter Villains might have been a more difficult book to perform since the protagonist is purposefully trying to be funny or convey the absurdity of a situation, and that sometimes comes off as Will seeming to be laughing at the writing rather than Charlie acknowledging the ridiculous of this life he has been thrust into. If you’re a fan of Scalzi’s writing, or books that poke fun of tropes, I suggest checking this one out because it was the only one of the three books I found myself audibly laughing (although the other two are awesome for other reasons).